It was a small group today, but we had very good conversations.
We were supposed to have written a short story about how we felt after our health changed. I procrastinated and procrastinated but once I started to write it flew out fast and angry. I wrote about how I though I was not going to survive, and about the pain my family was going through. I wrote about how much anger I felt toward the medical system over mistreatment I received. I had though that a lot of that anger was put behind me but once I opened the flood gates there was no stopping me spewing pain and anger all over the paper. When we were discussing the activity I found I was willing to read it out loud to the others. Sharing my writing was a big step too.
Next we did a collage using pictures from magazines that showed our journey. I really enjoyed doing it and took a long time and worked on a lot of details. I found that as I moved from one side of the page to the other I portrayed a real sense of empowerment and a process where I was getting control of my life again and enjoying the company and support of others. I was slowly finding joy as I looked over the past two years. If I am a caterpillar it is taking a very time to to turn into a butterfly.
Anger and joy in one afternoon is exhausting.
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